bones

the trees have become bones. the gristle of gold gone. the outlines are beautiful, blueprints for the spring.

the black tiger

another one for the dream files. at first it was just a flash, a symbol. last night there was movement. it was a black tiger with stripes of muted black and dark rich ebony. his eyes were pale and mesmerizing, determined. sometimes they were green, sometimes a shade close to indigo. art.in.progress. the movement was all about the swagger, the grace of the prowl.

art.in.progress: dancing squares of light

our bedroom is a light exhibit. we have a window and a set of double doors that house translucent plastic for privacy. a temporary measure. the top 10% is open to the sky. depending on the hour, the sun (and moon) casts tattoos of different sizes of squares on alternating walls. the walls are dreamy blue. simple beauty.

lucky 13

howl at the moon, it's friday the 13th.

another dream about a library

there were these piles of vintage books of poetry not stacked on the shelf vertically but horizontally like you would see on a coffee table. for some reason I knew the library was phasing these books out. I could not see why as they possessed charms of French paper products. modern books can never match this. except maybe paris out of hand. i think it means i should get back to my story and write more poetry.

smokin'

how does one complete the most deluxe fall day? with smokehouse chicken and ice cream, that's how. the day was gorgeous. fall leaves in their full rich colour, warm sun that felt like August, porch chatter with all the neighbourly charms. great company. as the sun set, dinner was on my mind. if you are a meat eater and live in toronto, you must try this place. even the sides were sublime. (no mayo potato salad and green beans). we had to share the last chicken because they were sold out but every last bite was worth it. smokey freshness, bbq heaven. in a word: incredible.

thank.you

for the moral support, that arrived in my inbox, comments on the blog and in person visits. you guys are helping me through this quest and I am so grateful. i am lucky to have your love and encouragement. i know that all the coaches will make the difference. thanks for believing. appreciated.

coins + snow forts

i have been meaning to capture these memorable dreams for awhile. they felt like they were worth saving, a snapshot of my state in this moment. ideas welcome.

coins
dreamt i was going to a benefit and was stalled at the door trying to get the admission fee together. there were these beautiful coins, smaler than a penny but the colour of a dime. one had an ornate 7 on it. very dainty and magical. i lost track of the task at hand and was consumed by the artistic merit of these coins. i even wondered whether the Italian lire still existed, these were coins worthy of the italians.

snow fort
i was an adult but a friend called on me to play. we went outside and were gleeful at the site of this open air igloo. no top but blocks of snow and deluxe snow couches.

ass backwards

today was a tough day after a few weeks of languish. bad habits and short cuts galore. tomorrow is a new day. kick it into high gear. moral support welcome. most days I put on a brave face. the only way to get the happy ending i want is to stop the damn self pity party and become the heroine I know is required and write the story myself. no one said it was going to be easy. seize life, go after the goods. you.can.do.it.