Thursday, August 07, 2008
the guilt stops here.
i have had more family interaction of late and have noticed some old habits and patterns with new eyes. i need to ask for what i want and not be ruled by guilt or molding myself to fit others expectations. i need to stop the numbness when my family tries to meddle. and trust me, they are in full force where meddling is concerned these days. i just find myself not reacting at the time and then waking in the wee hours arguing with them in my head. not very effective. perhaps the first step is noticing these things. i think it is time for me to rise to the occasion. to summon my hearty backbone and stop the guilt once and for all. i think it is part of a broader healing process but that's another story.
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3 comments:
i can deeply feel with you and agree in each point.
hard work to do. i know also this talks in the night or in meditaion - or even during the day in the garden or when i do my ironing ;-)
keep on working - and healing will take place, every day a step forward so it'll grow
I can completely relate. Hard work this and I still have to focus on it.
ahhh...family....you choose your friends, but you don't choose your family! and guilt, they are pretty good at that, aren't they? a life long journey it is to deal with that one...surround yourself with as many people that make you feel great about yourself. you are awesome! remember the "secret sauce" you talked about and think about those blueberries...
yvette in steeltown
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